A man walks into a bar he orders a drink

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

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What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

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Yo momma is so stupid when she drove to Disney World she saw that said "Disney World Left" so she turned on her turn signal and made a left turn. She promptly arrived at Disney World but realized she had left her wallet at the hotel.

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roses are red violets are blue im a paki and you are a jew!

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antijoke is the best website.

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I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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How do u say hi to a black person JUST SAY HI RACIST

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Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

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Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

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Burp

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Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops