Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

A muslim walks out of a plane.

Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

Whats fast, dead and make of CGI. Paul Walker

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Knock Knock. Doors open

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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