Matthew Baker

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

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why did the chicken cross the world becuase he had to go in the bathroom

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Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

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Wanna hear a joke??... No...... oh ok :(

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U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

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Why did so many describe Billy as glued to the t.v.? A terrible case of bullying and superglue resulted in the inability of Billy to remove himself from his own t.v., causing immense feelings of revenge, but his inability to move left these feelings unfulfilled.

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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Jim: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bill: Why? Jim: To get to the other side! Bill: I don't get it Jim: It's an anti-joke, because you expect a punchline but there is no punchline, you get it? Bill: Hold on, let me tickle myself.......oh okay now I get it hahahahaha!

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

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Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

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What did the little boy with cancer get for his birthday .............. Nothing because he died before his birthday

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

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This is an anti- joke

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Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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