How do prevent a black man from robbing your house? Lock you doors and perhaps get an up-to-date security system.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the girl run over the road? Her buttons rolled to the other side! (From a book called... Al-capone does my shirts) (Natilie)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

thumb_up thumb_down -15

In your case, maybe because it is time to stop thinking so much, and begin living life, if the world cannot appreciate a wise man such as yourself, maybe that man should stop being wise, and begin being happy.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

There once was an old man. He had worked hard his whole life to make sure his children got everything they needed, and that they were always happy. He had a beautiul life and a great big house with a marvelous view of the ocean. In time his kids moved away, and his wife died. The old man was left all by himself in the great big house, and sometimes the emptiness of the house reminded him of the emptiness of his own heart. He very seldom cried though, and kept all of his emotions inside. One day it all became to much for him and he took his own life in the silence of his great big empty house. I was that ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being chased by other cannibal chickens.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Insert joke that isn't even an anti joke = The new jokes on anti joke now.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs? We're going to have to amputate it to prevent infection, you won't be able to walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops