Q: Why are elephants afraid of mice and/or rats? A: Elephants tend to have bad eyesight and startle quite easily?

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

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Neither have I, nobody knew him.

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Knock Knock Who's there

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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A White, Black, Hispanic, and an Asian man are stranded on a deserted island. They become best friends, proving race should not be a divisive factor in any community.

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Once upon a time there was a boy who was 16 and a girl who was 14. The guy is in year 10 and the girls is in year 9 . Alot of people think he is a pedofile. Comment your opinion.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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