What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

Shltskc gw? G

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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