what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

thumb_up thumb_down +6

YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how many jews fit in an oven? none, its illegal to put a person in an oven....

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Ya Mums so fat when she stood on the scales it came up with my phone number

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Duck walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the best part about having sex with twenty four year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Can midgets still have big dreams?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops