Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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