knock knock who's there Bob oh hi, come in

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

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batman farted so hes retarded

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Charlie Sheen is winning

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I used to say "I used to be an adventurer like you but then I took an arrow to the knee" like you but then I took an arrow in the knee.

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i have yougurt mit traktor

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A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

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U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

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Rush Limbaugh

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Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

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Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

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How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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a grasshopper walks into a bar the bartender says hey we have a drink named after you the grasshopper says what dave?

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I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

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How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops