Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

thumb_up thumb_down

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

thumb_up thumb_down

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

thumb_up thumb_down

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do gingers smell so bad? So the blind can hate them too

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the murderer say to the man... i'm going to kill you

thumb_up thumb_down

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

thumb_up thumb_down

How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

thumb_up thumb_down

When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

thumb_up thumb_down

In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you stop a black man from bleeding? You give him a bandaid. What if he keeps crying? Tell him to stop. What if he cries more? Buy him an ostrich.

thumb_up thumb_down

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

thumb_up thumb_down

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops