Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than Hitler killing six million Jews? All of the Jews. --ZeNaziGermanDoctior

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Smelly Indians.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

horses are burgers now ive got the flu watch out tescos because im gonna sue

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A white man is running away from a black man. Because they are Playing tag. A gaming involving to touch the other person

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops