guess what? WHAT? Idk.

Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

Why did the asbestos cross the road? Because it was being removed from an elementary school due to the fact that asbestos is an air pollutant which is regulated under section 112 of the Clean Air Act of 1970.

Why do we park in driveways and drive in parkways? Good question.

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

My dog barks when someones at the door.

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

I heard that you could burn punds so I found a fat kid and set him on fire

Women's rights.

What do you give a black man for his Christmas? A gift that you feel would suit his personality so that he may draw enjoyment from said gift.

what are you mike bibby?

how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

Why did the plane crash? Because he pilot was a loaf of bread

what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My heart skipped a beat, I'm dead.

His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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