The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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What did little John get for his birthday? No sort of disease or illness of any kind because he was in perfect health. He also got an Xbox.

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your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

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What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

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Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

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What do you call a black stormtrooper. What ever his name happens to be.

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Why did the Flintstones have Christmas? The Flintstones celebrated Christmas because the creator, William Hanna, celebrated it. As it is a kids TV show, you can't expect it to be factually correct.

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Why was 13 afraid of 27 Because 51 had an extra penis

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Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

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what did the mexican do yesterday? bang your mom

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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