A man noticed that the sun was coming in brightly through his window. He was trying to take a nap and didnt appreciate the sunlight. He closed the blinds.

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

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What is the funniest joke in the world? Written.

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How do you make a dentist cry? Kill all his family.

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What's worse than having to listen a song from Justin Bieber? Being wrongfully convicted of child molestation,rape and murder and spending 50 years in prison before being acquited by DNA-analysis.

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a horse is a horse. of course of course....unless its a cow

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

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What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

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A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

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What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops