A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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The cream, it is coming

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

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A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

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whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

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There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

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If I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet.... dklaujeo bnvalue doiandkluq!!

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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