Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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What is more addictive than World Of Warcraft? Heroin

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

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Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

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What's white and is your slave? Your computer.

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

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Phew... it's gone.

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Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

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What happens when a gay guy and a hillbilly enter at the same bar togather? a police dog nation gards and a priest had to stop the abomination.

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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The other day I went to the holocaust museum and it was horrible No air conditioning or cold drinks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops