Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says to the horse y the long face the horse is unable to speak English, shits on the floor than leaves.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit her in the face with a ax!

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What's red and a cow? Red cow

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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what do you call a black chef glendon

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

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Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

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What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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