My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "What'll it be?" The horse never replied.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a flying Jew? Smoke

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

yo mama so fat she had to eat healthy food and exercise daily

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +7

a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the best part of twenty one year old's? Their bodies have matured enough that the U.S. government deems it safe for them to consume alcoholic beverages with proper I.D.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock. Get out!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops