What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

How tall is oprah.. 5'7

Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

the NAACP

What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

Why isn't this joke funny? Because it has no point.

A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

Argon walks into a bar. The bartender yells, "Get the hell out!" Argon doesn't react.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

A baby seal walks into a club.

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

eh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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