Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

thumb_up thumb_down +7

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a cow without legs? Disabled.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Pokemon are fictional, therefore Pikachu is fictional, meaning he would never be at a bus station in the real world at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops