What do a black man and a cop have in common? They are both not cabbages.

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Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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Hey Lady Gaga, Madonna called, she wants her clothes back; she lend them to you weeks ago for a concert because you didn't have anything to wear and you haven't returned them yet.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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Q. Why did the television set turn on? A. Because someone pressed the power button.

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What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

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Why did the man think he was hungry? Answer: Because his brain told that he needed to Eat or he was going to be really hungry. Made by eli

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

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24

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I've got a shotgun, Give me the money.

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

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What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

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Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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