Q. What is the answer to life the universe and everything A. 42

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

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Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

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How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

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Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

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what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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An escalade with 5 black men crashes off a cliff and all of them die. this is terrible. an escalade seats 7.

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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What's your blood type? Red.

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Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

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J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

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why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

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Who is it?

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Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

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Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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Lol... (wow you made me type lol), "like it is nothing to be ashamed of?" Your eyes are really beautiful, honestly probably the most beautiful eyes I have seen... And no, I am not talking about your bewbs.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops