What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

11th September jokes are just plane wrong.

A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

(Knocks on Helen Keller's door) You: Knock knock Helen:....

Anti-Joke.com Post anonymously with no editing!

ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

What did Luigi say to Mario? You look like a fat Mexican

why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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