What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

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Q: How many Marys does it take to drive you crazy? A: Just one ::stares at Mary Annoyingly::

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Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

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How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What's heed and has wheels? Your mom.

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

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Yo mamma so poor she got a job.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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- what do u call a dead black person a problem - what do u call a lot of dead black people a big problem - what do you call a mass killing of all black people. genocide

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What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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