Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What's worse than finding out your dad has AIDS? Finding out your little brother also has it, but you and your mother don't.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

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whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

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What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

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How do you end a sentence

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

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What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

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What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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