A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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I love you! Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Squirrels are rabbid Yes mi this is a haiku!!!! I know ur reading this so grape grape grape

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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your momma's so fat that we are all seriously concerned for her health.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It probably saw an animal that it wanted to chase, or a person carrying food, or another dog that it wanted to make friends with.

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Jane asked her husband why he was crying, he replied "Because i have extremely agressive cancer" hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.....Cancer

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo Don't worry I'll be there too! Not in the cage But laughing at you! ??

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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Why is the redneck crying? They died of diabeetus.

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why was their a child on the sun? There wasn't he would be incinerated

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roses are red so is ur face dont look at me like im a crazy bitch

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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the midget went to the midget store

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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What do you get when you cross a squirrel and a horse? Each animal has a different number of genetic faults therefore such a process would be impossible.

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Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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