A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face" To which the horse replies by trampling him to death for making rude remarks about his face.

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how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

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Your momma is so old, it is likely that she will pass away in the near future, and I would recommend you to spend some quality time with her.

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Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

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21 Ways to Annoy Everybody 1) Pretend to be one of the Bush family. Doesn't matter which. 2) Have an uncontrollable lusting for someone else every five minutes. 3) Pretend to be from different ethnic backgrounds every hour, and when people ask you about it, answer like a hillbilly would. 4) Act like a hillbilly. Period. 5) Improvise Italian operas. 6) Gossip about someone to their face. 7) Answer every question with a question. 8) Repeat yourself constantly. 9) Act like a member of the opposite sex. 10) Repeat yourself constantly. 11) Act like Mr. Flanders from The Simpsons. 12) Repeat yourself constantly. 13) Change what you repeat every now and then. 14) Use homonyms in your e-male that the spell cheque would knot sea as miss steaks. 15) Change what you repeat every now and then. 16) Talk to someone while looking at somebody else. 17) Employ in your casual banter extensive vocabulary that will befuddle thy contemporaries. 18) Change what you repeat every now and then. 19) One word: Caffeine. 20) Another word or two: Caffeine and Sugar. 21) stringwhateveryousayintoonelongwordsoitshardtomakeoutwhatyou'resaying.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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mikey is cute

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

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your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

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Why did the beautiful girl get the job over the not so beautiful looking girl She was more qualified

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MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunette: it stands for I Don't Know Blonde: okay, I get it now

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"Where's your mom?' "She died last night. . ."

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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What is the best thing in the world? The opposite of the worst thing in the world.

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What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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