Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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what are three short words? i a am

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a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

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Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

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two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

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Q:What do you do when you see a talking raccoon A:Quit the LSD

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Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

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knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

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What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

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Justin's life

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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