Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

kkkk

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

Hey Shea

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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