Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

HELLO BENJAMIN HELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMINHELLO BENJAMIN

thumb_up thumb_down -21

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the butler say to the guest while his master is in the bathroom? Butler: "Sir, will you wait while the Master bathes?" Guest: "How long will he be, I'm quite busy!" Butler: "He shouldn't be long sir, he should be finishing up now."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yo mamma so poor she got a job.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

thumb_up thumb_down -21

the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

sorry, that was a really bad joke, joking just joking, of course we can chat later, you got something in particular to do?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops