What do you call a black guy holding a crate of watermelons? a farmer

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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What stops a train? A missile

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What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

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how do u make a baby cry? you shouldnt. Stop thinking of ways to make a kid cry... asshole.

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I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

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Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

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Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

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So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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