Guns dont kill people...whoever pulled the trigger kills people

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What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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Of course, first door on your left

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technological age we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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