What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

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What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm. Being raped. What's worse than being raped. Being raped twice. What's worse than being raped twice. Biting into your apple and finding a worm then throwing away that apple, retrieving another apple them biting into it and finding another worm then being raped twice. In the same 5 minutes.

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A Muslim, a Buddhist, and a Christian are on a plain. They have to jump off for some reason. The Muslim straps a bomb to his chest, jumps out of the plain, and screams "AHLA AKBAH"!!!! The Buddhist jumps out and says save me heavenly Buddha. A giant golden hand catches him and lightly places him on land. The Christian says "aw hell with this" and jumps out, then says "save me heavenly Buddha". The giant golden hand places him down gently on land. The Christian then says "thank god". The giant golden hand comes back down and kills him.

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Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

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Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

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george goodburn is secretly mexican

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Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard and practice daily.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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What do u call a bunch of white dudes siting on a bench ......the NBA

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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Why did the boy cut his hair? Because he was large.

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If your Uncle Jack helped you off an elephant, would you help your Uncle jackoff an elephant? Probably not because it would take more than 3 hands to jack off an elephant P.S. Your Uncle Jack only has 1 hand. Your uncle was on a swing and a clown cut off his hand with an ax

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*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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Dead girls can't say no.

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How Do You Fart Eat Beans

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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