What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

why did the chicken cross the road he didnt he was hit by a van

What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

Women's rights.

What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

What's got 2 thumbs and a massive penis? A body parts collector I know called Harold Fortescue

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

A man walks into a bar and orders a shot. The bartender asks to see his I.D. The man explains that he had lost his I.D. earlier in the day. The bartender then asked the man to leave, so he left.

-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

The cream, it is coming

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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