I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

No pen- no notes No notes- no study No study- no good grades No good grades- no diploma No diploma- no job No job- no money No money- no food No food- really skinny Really skinny- ugly Ugly- no wife No wife- no kids No kids- lonely Lonely- death No pen=death

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats brown and sticky? ..Poo

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Want to hear a dirty joke? The horse fell in the mud

thumb_up thumb_down -4

you give like i give lomain

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What Did The Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor.... "Wheres My Tractor"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the dog cross the road? To eat the chicken. Why did the police officer cross the road? To tranquilize the dog and the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So a horse walks into a barn.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the black man do after the white guy told a racist joke? Laugh

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

your mum

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"hey do you know the date" "58"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops