Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

A horse walks into a bar. He called him Arthur. Those are two sentences.

Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

What would Muhammed do?

hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

I love you

knock knock come in ok!!!!! ur an elephant oh ya i guess im not suppose to talk!

Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

Once upon a time, there was a Y O U M A D and they all lived happily ever after.

How did the boy compliment the girl? He told her she had a lot of breasts. In return, she told him he had many penises.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Well many scientists have theorized that a giant meteor hit the earth causing the extinction of most living things. Also if your christian : Dinosaurs never existed, evolution is the devils work, science is not the answer to the world's problems. Darwin was a foolish man, and thats that.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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