Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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why did the black go to the KFC because he likes fried chicken

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Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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Feminism.

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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why did the boy die? because he got shot

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

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how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

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what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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