When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

mom theres a naked old man outside my window and he stole dads ladder.

What do you call a camel with three humps? A deformed bactrian

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

I honestly have no idea what is upsetting you, why would I lie about my name? Please don't leave, you do remember me don't you? Can I call you over?

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

what did the guy say when his partner took a poop on his chest? It was unnecessary for you to deficate onto my chest. In no way at all was that sexually stimulating, and i shall consider seeking out a new partner.

Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

Nero, sure you are okay?

Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I'm color blind.

An automobile mechanic busted an engine fuse. A prostitute had oral sex with a Marine. An Inuit hunter detonated a sea mammal with TNT. What do they all have in common? They all blew a seal.

A blind man walked past a fish store. For a second he thought it might be a womens vaginal odor, but then concluded it was most likely a fish store, and went on with his day.

That's about as suspicious as a nun doing squats in a cucumber field.

Why does Justin Beiber look like a girl? Because he achieved international fame and fortune at a prepubescent age, and has made more money before he turned 18 than most people will in their entire lives.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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