Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

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So a hispanic man and a black man jump from a tree, which one hits the ground first? The hispanic man, the rope caught the black man.

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Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

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cerleb i wrote the one about melons!

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I got a new jacket. The jacket had real cotton inside the sleeves. The next day my new jacket was gone, but the one i bought yesterday wasn't.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

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A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

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A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

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A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

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Are you a tree

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awkies when u see danni white fingering jacob :0;0;0;0, and jamie fingering himself..............

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Knock Knock Who's there? ........

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What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

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Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

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whats green and dont fit? a dead epileptic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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