"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

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What's the difference between a lamp?

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

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Why didn't Michael Jackson celebrate his birthday? He's dead.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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What came in like a wrecking ball? A wrecking ball.

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What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

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what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

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I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

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when debbie meets downer

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why did the man cry... He got hit with a fridge

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A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

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What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

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http://www.com/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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