How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

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Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

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Why did you fall? Because of my buttcrack.

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What is worse than going to school? Nothing.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

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What do you call a black man with no legs? Crippled.

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road. Because roads were not invented then dumbass.

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a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

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Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

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whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

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My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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