How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

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What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

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A guy was beet by his wife.

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What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from K.F.C

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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If youre African, why are you white?

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

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What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

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How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

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Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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