Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

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What does pooh bear call his grandma? Pooh nanny.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

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I was just entering the toilet in a transport cafe just as a lorry driver was coming out. "I wouldn't go in there mate if I was you" he said "Why does it smell?" I enquired "No I've just murdered a prostitute"

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what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

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What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

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I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

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- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A blond Canadian and his Korean friend are going together to Korea. When checking in the person asks the Canadian if he has a return ticket leaving the country. He replies yes but he does not have it on him. According to Korean Customs and Immigration laws a non-Korean citizen must have a return ticket to enter the country. Inevitably follows a long and tedious process in order to procure the ticket in order to pass customs. The Korean and the Canadian continue to their boarding gate.

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What's worse than finding a Worm in your Apple? being Mauled to death.

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Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and the Devil all walk into a bar. Biden and Obama order a couple of beers and begin quietly conversing, while their security detail stands next to them. "The Devil" is actually a heavily tattooed performance artist, who in 1999 legally changed his name from Jim Larson. He has just gotten off work at his day job (a paralegal at a medium-sized firm), and is relaxing with a Johnnie Walker at the bar. Although he notices the president and vice president nearby, he has seen many politicians during his time working in DC, and so hardly pays attention.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? Ow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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