A bear walks into a bar, and says "I would like a pint of..........beer." The bar tender asked "why the long pause?" The bear replies "I think I just had a stroke."

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

Why did litltle Susie drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

Dude man, I'm high...

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The three of them discuss theology for quite some time and then begin approach various patrons with invites to attend their respective Sunday services.

When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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