Why did Ant Man die? He was shot by a gangster, duh.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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What do you call a man with a gun in his mouth? Keith.

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What do two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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whats worse that finding your having sex with your long lost sister? having sex with your long lost brother

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? AIDs then he got mugged on the way home from the hospital

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. He was stapled to the baby.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

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"If life was fair, I would have a girlfriend" - William Deane

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why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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