Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

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When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I am a dog.

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So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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Q: Why did the little girl scream? A: She didn't have a rape whistle.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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why was the man walking in the kitchen? idk thats why i asked

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What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

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"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

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roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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