Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

what did the mexican cop say to the mexican drug dealer? can i get some of that

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. The man apologizes, and the bra assures him not to worry. They both continue on their way. The man wonders what a bra is doing walking around unattached to a woman, especially this late at night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

Roses are Red Violets are Red Grass is Red Trees are Red My yard is on fire.

Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

Multi Orgasmic Pillow screechers

What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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