There once was a woman from Ealing, Who had a peculiar feeling She went to the doctors and was consequently diagnosed with Chlamydia

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Why did a black person get gingivitis? He repeatedly didn't brush which caused both dental plaque and tartar getting filled with harmful bacteria, and if they aren't removed from teeth, they will begin to irritate the gums and cause gingivitis.

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved. Q) Did you hear about the two guys who wanted to go to Paris? A) They didn't go! Q) Why did the boy throw his Television out the window? A) Cause it was completely broken. Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange. <<< This is the ultimate tough anti-joke Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Red paint. Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

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What did the little boy with cancer ask for from the Make a Wish foundation. A cure and to lose his virginity before he dies.

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did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

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This statement is false.

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What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

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I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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What do Hitler and Jesus have in common? Facial hair.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

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whats funny about the klu klux klan? nothing is funny at all about it because they cause pain and suffering to afircan amaricans and other ethnic groups.

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What do u call a cripple Biv

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Knock Knock Whos there? Opportunity

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what is black and looks like a rasberry a blackberry

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What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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