How many Poles does it take to change a lightbulb? Just the one, usually.

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You are a special guy, and I mean that in a really sweet way, but a retard no. Synapses, tell me more please.

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DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Mets.

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roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

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Why did they black straight guy go into an all white gay bar....? Because he went to the wrong place.

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Nero here, nice to see you guys again, now you know why my babbling has been excessive (and pissed at the comments below, but now that the pills are working I am calm) Anyway, yeah point Zero is my "world" now, and its been thriving under my values (something I feared would just work on paper, and if so such beliefs would all been for nothing) As for hero... Well insert something like "I am no hero, I just do what is right" or something cheesy, or... Well, thats what I do really... Since nobody uses this site Ill extend the time you "former followers" can chat, as I got some nice stuff to share, and might just share a bit before I pass away (nah, but I will sleep when tired), I got a lot to do tomorrow.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

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One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

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A mexican and a black person are in the back of a car. Whos driving? A bus driver.

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin Before He Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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