Ben: Something smells like updog. Jenny: What's updog? Ben: Nothin' much

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson. I spelled "red" wrong.

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go F*** yourself

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A giant meteor will hit the earth tomorrow.What do you do? Tell everyone I told you so.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am couler-blind, and poetry is gay

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A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

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Why did the stereo break? Cause little Johnny threw a bat at it.

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Why did the polar bear die? Global warming.

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What's worse than winning the lottery? Anything, really...

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What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

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What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

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A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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I went to the principle's office because I had a hard time reading They tried to tell me I was lesdistic

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A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

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Your Mommy is a gas pump.

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I like Pi. It can make circles.

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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Ten years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash ... now we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.

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Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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If a small quiz is a quizicle then what is a small test? A quiz.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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