A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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A wooly mammoth and a dodo bird walk into a bar. Just kidding.

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

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What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

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Hi

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What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

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One day little billy was wandering happily through the forest.He then trips and his legs disintegrate

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? I throw a refrigerator at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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